When You Live Your Life, Things Happen

Those things that happen may be good things, they may be bad things, they may be so-so things. Or they may seem to be one, and are actually something else, altogether. A good thing may have been misunderstood, and you dealt with it in the incorrect way. Or a bad thing may actually teach your something you hadn't properly understood before, and you gain better understanding.

When those bad things happen, the worst thing you can do is curl up in a ball and hide from the event. Bad things are always things that require action to stop the harm for escalating. If the things is a medical related thing - a sprain for instance, using the sprained limb will make it worse not better, but it may be broken, so it will probably benefit from a doctor or nurse looking at it. And a sprain will need thought to rearrange chores, get assistance and so on.

If the bad thing is a misunderstanding, where you have been what you feel is wrongly accused of something, acknowledging the fact that the other person thinks you've done something wrong, gives them the satisfaction of knowing you heard what they think, and so feel somewhat validated. You may not agree with them, but having acknowledged their understood truth, you have no need to take it further, and argue about it. We all have the right to own our truth, as we see it.

If it turns out later on, that you were in fact wrong and the other person correct, don't just leave it along, acknowledge it, and you can both move on with your lives, neither holding angry thoughts about it (one hopes). If it turns out the other person wants to hold on to the thing, let that be there idea to hold, and let them go with it, neither arguing, or submitting to further abuse. You have done the right thing in your acknowledgement, it's the role of the other person to accept that.

Let the bad thing be something you can learn from. Be kind to yourself, but be prepared to learn from your mistakes ...

4 Ways to Win In Life

       Thank the others involved in your successes
Be prepared to accept blame when appropriate
Always offer sincere apologise as needed
Be grateful when things go well

These are a few thoughts that have occurred to me, in response to reading a post on Facebook concerning the idea of ‘Three things that will guarantee you do badly in life’ or something similar to that. It seemed to me looking at life in a negative way wouldn't lead to a happy life, even if it led to you being aware of the things that can go wrong.

I would always rather see the good things in life, not the bad things, even though I am certainly conscious of the possibility of bad things happening. So anyway, I'm glad I wrote my list of ways to win in life, rather ways to make yourself lose.

I have recently been involved in a successful event held in a town quite close to where I live. This event the Gawler Festival of Words, was held over three days and two nights, and much fun and learning happened. Words were spoken, films views, works written, and a train ride was had after viewing some art in an Art Gallery (Gawler Community Gallery).

There was also yummy food and drink consumed, books launched, and hugs given! I think upholding the four principles as listed about, helped in the process of making this Festival great. We (the Adelaide Plains Poets) also successfully held this event last year, and we are already planning what is going to happen at the Festival next year!

I am the leader of the team, and I sincerely thank them for all of their work getting this happening! Passionate people all working for the same cause can make wonderful things happen! We worked at 'spreading the love' by using three different venues for catering, and made sure those people involved knew how much we appreciated them.

So to the people at the P/A Hotel, the Poetic Justice Cafe Gallery and the Alchemy Cafe, all in Gawler, I thank you very much for helping to make the 2016 Gawler Festival of Words a fantastic event!

Be Kind to Yourself First!

There are people out there who do many good things for many people, or do amazingly good things on one particular person. We celebrate these people, and thank them sometimes, (and sometimes not). Regardless of the celebrations and thanks though, these amazing kind people keep on doing their kind things, because that's the kind of people they are.

If you are one of these lovely kind people, whether a worker, volunteer,

loved one or community member, thank you very much. Your actions deserve to be front page news, because it's people like you who make our lives worth living. You help out for little or no pay, you step in and do things when needed, where others would step away and do nothing.

Your are kind to many, and possible too few thank you for all you do. The thanks are not why you do the kind things you do, you simply believe in doing the right and kind thing. I thank you for the good and kind things you do, You help to make the whole world a better place for all, because you show everyone around you that good things happen, and believing in the possibility of good can warm our hearts and keep us going when things seem too hard.

So, many thanks you, you wonderful kind people, but ... There's always a but, isn't there. This is an important one, please pay attention to this ... Doing good for others is a wonderful thing to do, but the most important person you must always remember to do good things for, the person you should be kind to first, is YOURSELF!

If you're always too busy being kind to other people, and never have any time left to do good things for yourself, you will burn out, the well of kindness will dry up and you will eventually not be able to do anything at all, no good things and no kind actions, you will have run out of the good things. The best way to refill your well of kindness is to top it up regularly, and the easiest way to keep on top of that is to do good things for yourself first!

Yes YOU, put your name at the top of the list of people to be kind to, to good things for, because when you are kind to yourself, you have more to give to other people. Being good to yourself doesn't drain the well of kindness, it fills it up. So when your a parent, and you want to reward your child with something yummy, because they've done something well, Get yourself something yummy too.

If you're helping someone with their garden, or their shopping, get something good for yourself from the garden - a flower, a strawberry, a cutting, or buy yourself something extra while you're buying the shopping for the other person.

If you're taking someone out for the day, why not take them somewhere you want to go too, not just where they want to go. The kinder you are to yourself, the happier and more productive you'll be, give it a try, and see for yourself!

Give Life a Try!

Carolyn Cordon

Yesterday · 

If it doesn't hurt you or anyone you care about, and it's something you want to do,then do it, or you may end up regretting it for the rest of your life!

Being afraid to try a new thing is sometimes the most terrible thing in life. If you end your life regretting not doing something, can you say you lived a great life?

Puppies learn what tastes good, by chewing on things, they get to eat more tasty things that way!

Stop & Let the Sunshine In

When life kicks you down, and you go on again and again travelling the same dark and dirty roads, you'll never heal. Step out into life's sunshine, and let the sun shine its healing light down on you.

Healing takes time, and if you go on and on doing the wrong thing, stupid things, things that have hurt you in the past, you won't have time to heal. When you take the time to rest, be mindful - look at what's wrong in your life, then you may have time to heal from the pain you're suffering from.

So look around you, see who's doing well, and what it is they're doing. Can you change what you're doing in life, and take on some of what they're doing? Find the things that bring true happiness to your life. Flowers, puppies, kittens, friends, good food. 

Whatever it is, try to get more of it. Don't concern yourself with other people, concern yourself with yourself. When you learn to care about yourself, in truly caring ways, ways that bring good things to your heart and soul, then you can beging the healing process.

Science can be Sooooo Cruel!

http://www.theguardian.com/science/2015/apr/18/animal-lives-wasted-in-drugs-safety-tests?CMP=ema_632

I found this article talking about the creatures who gave their lives in scientific experiments that didn't offer much of use to science, online recently. In a properly designed and funded experiment, the lives of animals may be worthwhile, but the article talks of experiments that are poorly designed and run in a number of ways.

These animals of course were probably bred for the purpose of assisting in scientific experiments, but that doesn't mean their lives can just be wasted on useless experimentation. The article focuses on the UK, but I expect the truth is that it's a worldwide thing, with rats, mice and other creatures dying for little good.

Just because scientific experimentation was why they were brought into the world doesn't mean having them die in this useless way is OK. The whole idea of the ways humans use and abuse animals is a fraught one. On the one hand, humans are the ones who undertake to bring these creatures into existence for the purpose of assisting them with their work.

On the other hand though, all creatures have some rights, don't they? Some lobby groups would say they most certainly do, others may be more equivocal about the issue. Other groups might say, they're only critters, who cares?

I have to confess I'm in the equivocal group. I believe that animals can play a useful part in scientific experimentation, and the endeavour is one that whould continue, for the betterment of mankind. But if these small lives are wasted, with no useful result for mankind, I am dead-set against it. Is this too namby-pamby? Should I rise up against this?

I am against animal cruelty, but I live with four dogs, and I have been involved in the breeding of dogs for pets and for showing in the past. Some animal rights groups (PETA in particulare) are against the keeping of animals as companions, and they feel they should be set free. I completely oppose this idea. I do my best to give my dogs a good life, with food, shelter and love. If I set my dogs free, Idon't think they would be happier in the long run than they are now, living with us.

I don't know all of the answers, but I hope that by writing this article, I may get others thinking further on the issue ...  I welcome the thoughts of others on these issues.

How to Remember me when I Go

These are not my final words, I'm certainly not thinking of leaving this world just yet. When I go, I want it to happen after a full and happy life, and while my life is certainly a happy one, I still have many things I wish to do before the end.

But I've been thinking about things, about people I know, choices I've made, and others have made. Lots of poeple want to be remembered for big things - buildings designed, trophies won, and so forth. My ideas are different. I'm never going to build a house that amazes all, I don't ever want to build any house. And I'm never going to run races, and win in record times.

My garden has lovely things in it, but it's not the most gorgeous and amazing garden ever. I'm not breathtakingly gorgeous, or the sexiest little minx anyone could ever imagine. No, I'm none of these things. Nor am I an absolute genius who creates wonderful machines, or finds answers formerly unknown to mankind.

What I am, is a person who cares about other people. I'm quite good at listening quietly. Listening is a skill not all are able to do well. To listen, one must switch off their own mind chatter, and properly pay attention to the words spoken to you. And you must switch off your critic - your opinions and answers aren't needed at this listening stage.

Sometimes a kind and quiet listener can be the best thing for a troubled person. If you can fill that role, and do it well, you can be a life-saver. You can be the quiet hero, just because you cared enough to listen, just listen.

So when I do die, I hope at least some people will remember me as a good listener. That's all, just a good listener. Thank you.

Being Kind to this lonely little blog ...

I've been neglecting this blog shamefully. It's done nothing wrong, it doesn't deserve to be neglected like this. I wrote a comment on a friend's Facebook page a little while ago. I like the comment, and it's had some interesting response from others.

After I read my comment again, I thought, hmm, where could I further expand on this thought? And the answer that came to me, was, to write about it on this blog. It's totally relevant to the blog, being about kindness...

So this was my comment:

'Always be kind to yourself, at least as kind as you are to those you love.'

I truly believe this to be true. I always give myself the benefit of the doubt. I deserve that, just as I believe other people deserve it too. I try to consider my actions though, to decide whether I actually deserve the kindness I've given to myself. I'm not perfect, no human being is. Sometimes I'm lazy, selfish, thoughtless and so on. But on considering the reasons why I fail to achieve perfection, I can find answers to help me next time...

With the blogging thing, neglecting this blog, which probably could be a much more widely used blog, I know the reasons for the neglect, to some extent. I got hooked on blogging and went overboard with it, first one blog, then two and now suddenly I have hmm, I'm not really sure how many, perhaps twelve...

I go to some of them more often. The ones relevant to possible money making things, get the most attention, as is a good idea, I feel. This blog here though, a blog about being kind, well surely that should get more attention. There is a terrible deficit of kindness in the world. People feel bad, they lash out at others, and kindness is completely forgotten ...

I remember the kindness issue though. In my comments online, I try to be kind. In my dealings with others in 'the real world' I try to be kind. I know other people appreciate my kindness, because they tell me so. I hope I am spreading a network of kindness. 

Do you know someone who could do with some kindness? Let them know you care, tell them and show them in your actions that you care. You will both benefit from it. If the someone who needs the kindness, well, what a great start it would be, to do something nice to yourself. Think of something you'd like to do, see, hear, and do it - plant something, taste something, see something, and enjoy being kind to yourself!

Thinking about Life

Hugs and love and beautiful words bring life to life! Do you believe those words? I believe them, deeply in my mind and in that place inside where good things grow and become lovely.

I’m a poet, and I love to share my words. I use my words to find some clarity in my life, and the lives I see all around me. Using words well requires thinking, thinking that goes further than the obvious, delves deeper than shallow first thoughts, that can be easily spewed up without any reflection.

This thinking more deeply and creating art, whether it’s in words, or images, or shapes, adds to the lives of any and all who come to see, hear or read the thoughts or the representation of those thoughts. If you live your life shallowly, accepting without thought all you’re told, you will miss out on so much beauty.

If beauty is in the eye of the beholder, then the eye of a thoughtful beholder, one who considers the wonders of Nature and sees miracles in the mundane, will see the beauty in so much more. As the untutored child sees a bird and dreams of flight, so the thoughtful thinker sees life and dreams of higher levels of life. They don’t desire more electrical goods, or cars, in life, they desire more love and compassion, more books and beauty.

I strive to be one of those thoughtful thinkers. My words come from my thoughts, and from my dreams. They come from my hopes of my future and my hopes for the world. This is my life, and I want my life to live, to truly Live!

Thoughts about Good and Bad People

This is a strange period of time. Christmas approaches with all of the fun and stress that comes with that. And the Westernised part of the world thinks about the horror of what happened in the Newtown Sandy Hook Elementary School.

It's easy to cast the killer as an evil person, and consider it a thing that could not have been averted. This was a young man though, who had family, and a life. Something went wrong, and I wonder if this whole thing, and his attitudes to life and death could have been turned around if someone could have heard his voice.

Listening is a such a simple thing to do, properly listening to someone who needs to talk. If this man had been able to tell his story, and been properly heard, what may have changed?

There are bad people, there are good people. This man that killed these school children and adults at that school did a terrible thing. He is not evil, even though the act was evil. There were also good people on that awful day.

I wish there had been a good person to have listened to this young man, before he felt he had to do something to get the attention he craved. There was no-one there, not when they were needed. Are there enough good people in our world? Are you a good person?

How can you tell the difference between good people and bad people? Good people do good things and don't expect anything back when they do them. Bad people only do good things when they get something back from it.

I try to live my life as a good person. I hope you do too, can you honestly call yourself a good person?

Kindness comes in many forms

I try to be kind to others in my life. I give, without expecting anything in return, and I smile at strangers readily. My life has had it's challenges, the same as most people's lives.

I don't dwell on the bad things that have happened though, instead I focus on the good things. Every day that I can wake up and get out of bed is surely a good day!

Many people I know think I'm wonderful, because of my attitude to the things I have in my life. But I'm just an ordinary person, living my life in the best way possible. There are many people out there, having to live with things so much worse than what I live with.

I've just finished reading the memoir of a totally amazing young man. He is profoundly disable, unable to do for himself most of the things needed in life. He is one of the most positive people I know though, living his own life in the best way he can too. 

The young man is Philip Eling, and his memoir is 'Life is What You Make It'. I've met Philip several times now, and the more I see him, the more I'm thrilled to be his friend!

The reason I'm writing this blog post is to celebrate the life of a wonderful person, and also to meet an obligation I have. I connected on Facebook with a group which is promoting the idea of doing small kindnesses. I have included a link here, telling you about it. http://www.writingourwayhome.com/2012/11/small-kindnesses.html

Being kind to others is a gift that gives back to you. I may have said this on this blog before, but it's worth repeating it. Even a small kindness like smiling at someone can do immeasurable good. It's free, it feels good, and it's good for everyone involved!

I'm going to post the link here to the publisher of this book, and I strongly recommend you check it out - you'll be amazed at the strength of character of this young man. 

A Free Gift To You

Yes, I said a free gift, but I'm not talking about a thing you can hold in your hands. The free gift I'm talking about are these words:

"You, and only you, are responsible for your own happiness. How you look on your life will determine how happy you are, and how contented you feel."

Can you believe these words and shape your life around them? I hope you can, because if you do, you can go from having a bad life, to having a good life. We all have things that happen - accidents, illnesses negative people. These things can bring us down, so we feel like life is against us and there's nothing we can do about it.

Those feelings are wrong though. We can look at our life, and see many good things that are going on. Nature brings me many happy and positive things every day. It may be raining, but sometimes there's a rainbow shining down from the sky. Birds continue to tweet and chirp and fly from place to place. Our pets go on loving us every day...

If you want to live a life with much happiness, go out and find the happy moments that are already out there. It will change your life around, and Happiness will gather around you!

I write about my own life in various places, in real life, and online. This is another of my blogs, where I've spoken about living a positive life...

Be Kind and You Will Be Rewarded.

I try to do kind things every day. Sometimes it may be a kind smile to a friend, sometimes it may be something bigger. It always makes me feel better about myself and about the world in general.

Yesterday I needed help to do something and my needs were met. I was driving home from shopping and I needed some more petrol in my tank. The shopping had made me tired, and I wasn't sure if I would have enough strength in my right hand to activate the nozzle.

I got out of the car, hooked the nozzle up to my car's petrol tank, and got a trickle of fuel before my strength gave way. Just as I thought. I knew I would be able to full my tank a trickle a go, but it would completely take my strength away, and I was still a fair way from where I was going next.

I looked around for help and a van pulled up next to my car. I walked over to the person getting out of the van and smiled. I then explained what my problem was and asked it they would be able to help me.

The fellow said he was glad to help and came over and filled the tank for me much more quickly than I would have been able to. We chatted as the tank filled and he told me about a time when he did something nice for someone. That weekend he had a win of $1000 in X-Lotto!

This was amazing proof of the idea that Kindness is Rewarded. Sometimes the reward may only be the good feeling you get about yourself, but sometimes the reward can be much more!

I'm not saying necessarily that the kindness that man showed to another actually made the X-Lotto win occur, but it certainly made that man value the rewards of being kind even more. I thanked this man most profusely and wished him all the luck he deserved!

So this is a message to that man, whose name is Roger. Thank you so much Roger for being kind to someone in need!

It is also a message to everyone - Be Kind and You Will Be Rewarded!

Something to be Proud of

Today was a great day. In the morning I went to the Gawler Show. I had two free tickets to get in and I decided to find someone to give one of the tickets to.

The first people I found who didn't have tickets already looked like a lovely older couple. I smiled and approached them asking them if they were nice people. They said they were so I offered them the ticket.

They were very grateful and thanked me a lot. I said it was OK, and I hoped they would do something nice for someone else. They said they would and we all went in to the show.

I had a lovely day, feeling good about myself and people in general. Just think what a wonderful world it could be if we all did this kind of thing whenever we got the chance to!

I hope you would/will do this sort of thing. Even a heartfelt smile can do wonders, both for you and for the person you are smiling at.

Affirmations for Your Everyday Life

If your life is bringing you down, read these affirmations every single day, and tell yourself they are true and they are important. If you think of more affirming truths about yourself, add them to the list.

Our inner critic is ruthless in pointing out our bad points, our conscious mind needs to be every bit as ruthless in pointing out our good points. You are an important person!

· Positive thinking leads to a positive life.
· I am responsible for my own happiness.
· I will look at the positive things in my life.
· I am a worthwhile person.
· There are people in my life who love me.
· I deserve to be proud of what I have achieved in my life.

Many Who Have Little, Still Give More

When I have some spare time, I go to my email inbox and read through the emails I place in a folder. Today I read an email that brought me to a wonderful person who truly knows how to be kind.

This person is not rich, in fact he rates as a very poor person in terms of financial wealth. But this person is rich in spirit and gives to others who are far more financially able than he is himself.

Read the story here and think on it. Perhaps you may be able to find a little to give to those who have less.

If a beggar can find a way to help others, well off people should be able to do the same. I will find ways to give more to others, whether financially or in other ways. I hope others can find ways to do the same.

The Daily Good website has many stories such as this one. I recommend others sign up to receive heartening stories such as this one. I will show you that there is much good in the world.

Kindness is Contagious!

If you're kind to other people, they will be kind to someone else and it will go on and on from there!

Help to spread kindness throughout the world. Be kind to someone every day!

It can be as little as a friendly smile, but the benefits can be huge.

Kindness Comes in Many Ways

I have received kindness from family and friends on many occasions over my life. Rarely, if ever though, have I received corporate kindness.

I got an email recently though which showed that corporations could be kind, and help others to be kind. The email was from Daily Good, an organisation which is responsible for send messages of good and hope to subscribers.

The organisation in the story has begun running their cafe on a 'pay what you want to pay' basis, and they are relying on donations from the diners to keep running. I hope this system proves to be a good, working thing, and so spread further.

Read the article and tell me and the other readers what you think about it all.

Personally, I feel I would be inclined to pay at least the going rate, and more if I could afford to. Most of us have plenty for ourselves, and can afford to give to others who are less financially well off.

Making Connections, Being Kind

I realised this morning that I have been neglecting my blogs. It’s always the same - I start out keen and promise to post regularly, then life and/or laziness get in the way. And of course I have to confess I may have a slight addiction problem.

There, I’ve admitted to the problem my husband and son have told me I have for years. I spend/waste far too much time online. I am addicted to Facebook!

But I realise as well that being on Facebook is a cost effective and easy way to connect with my friends. Some of these friends I see regularly in real life, some occasionally. Some of my Facebook friends are people I will probably never meet for real.

But talking to these people, or commenting on their pages, is a way to connect. When you are trying to deal with a new illness, as I am, those connections are very important.

Connections, friendships are what give us hope, new ideas, answers, and new questions. Connections online can give you a new community to join. Having a community of people who you care about and who care about you can be an important thing in life.

I am grateful to all of the people who are my friends. They have given me love and support while I was confused, not knowing what was wrong with me. They kept me going while I was waiting for my diagnosis. They cheered with me once I finally had a title for my mystery illness. Many of my friends realised the importance of having a tag, a name for my disease.

Now that I know I have Multiple sclerosis, I know more about what I can expect with my health. I also have a treatment to help with the symptoms, and to slow down the illness’s progression.

So this blog post is to say thank you to all of my wonderful friends who have helped me in many different ways. Thank you all for your kindness!

Save the World with Kindness!

I want to do something positive in my life and I need all the help I can get! It won't cost you anything, and it will help to make you happier.

Interested? Then read on...

The world is a sad and angry place for so many people. We have people starving to death, and other people dying from obesity related diseases. We have conflicts in the of God and we have people spreading hatred against against people who don't believe in their God.

Angry people doing damage with road rage, Christian against non-Christian, Muslim against non-Muslim. It's time to stop!

You might say there's nothing you can do, but you're wrong! It's like the acorn story - a tiny acorn seed can grow into a mighty tree. All it needs is water and sun.

You can do your tiny acts of kindness and inspire others to do the same, and slowly, bit by bit, the world might begin to become more kind. Tell your children, your local politician, tell everybody!

All it takes is a kindly smile, a word of encouragement, a small donation. If we all work at being kind to people instead of being angry indifferent or dismissive, the kindness can grow and follow on from our kind actions.

That is my challenge to everybody, Let's make Kindness go Viral and Take Over the Whole World!